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Russia Happens in 3’s
Blowing up the dam was just one of three ‘disastrous accidents’ that were planned to stop Ukraine’s offensive
I imagine Russian generals sitting around with a bottle of vodka, an assortment of “zakuski” (snacks) like slices of bread, some pork fat, pickles, and thick slices of sausage on a centrally-located plate, and a big map of Ukraine.
“We need to slow down their offensive somehow. Our guys are goddamn useless. So, if we can’t beat them on the battlefield, then let’s beat them by turning their country into a toxic dump, New Jersey Pineland style,” one general says, wiping his mouth on the sleeve of his heavily-medalled uniform.
“Great idea. We can blow up a couple of dams (mission already completed, the Kakhovka and the Mokri Yali dams were blown up) and…”
“Maybe we can finally get that nuclear plant to start leaking some poison into the air. A clean-up would require a full cessation of their offensive and if they don’t stop, the world will be against Ukraine,” says another general pouring out a second shot. When drinking vodka, they say in Russian, “The rest between first and second shots should never be a long one.”
“Wow, great idea! And while we are at it, let’s blow up that ammonia pipeline, guys. What do you think…